What is Insomnia?

Insomnia, at its simplest form, is an inability to get restful sleep. I get a little angry when i hear someone who consistently stays up too late partying or watching TV refer to him or herself as an insomniac. An insomniac strives and struggles for sleep, and simply can't get it. No matter how early we go to bed, no matter how long we STAY in bed, it simply doesn't come.

And i'm not saying that there are no lifestyle causes for insomnia, either. There are. Excessive alcohol, caffeine or nicotine consumption can cause insomnia. Or consumption of any of these things too close to bedtime. For instance, i am a cigar smoker. Ideally, i like to smoke one or two cigars per day. Right now, because of financial constraints, i am smoking approximately one every other day. Today is my day to smoke a cigar, but i KNOW from personal experience that doing so increases my alertness. Since i'm going to be working at my "day" job from 11 this morning to 7:30 tonight, and will therefore not be home until around 8, and unable to smoke a cigar until an hour or two before bedtime tonight, i am smoking my cigar right now, at 9:16 in the morning. Probably not a good idea if you like to have a drink. If i decide to have a drink today, then i'll probably have it right after i get home, while i'm preparing dinner. That way i'll be done with it and it will have time to metabolize several hours before bedtime. If you like caffeine, then it would probably be to your advantage to reduce your caffeine consumption throughout the day and switch to decaf several hours before bed. As far as i know, too, these things accrue in your system. So if, like a former co-worker of mine, you tend to drink five or six 64-ounce soda pops during the day, switching to decaf shortly before bedtime probably won't help, because it will take longer than that to metabolize the caffeine that's already there.

What causes insomnia? This is where we really run into trouble, because there are MANY possible causes of insomnia, and narrowing down what is causing it in any individual case can be extremely difficult and time consuming. Another fun thing that i deal with is migraine headaches. After years of being on a narcotic pain killer for my migraines, which was a temporary fix, more of a band-aid than a real cure, i finally hooked up with a doctor who explained the CAUSES of migraines to me, and i was able to work through them until i could figure out what my triggers were and how to avoid them.

Psychological triggers for insomnia include anxiety, stress and depression. So the question is how do you avoid anxiety, stress and depression? The short answer is... you really can't. But what you CAN do is learn to cope with these things so that they don't eat you up. For instance, if you suffer depression, you can see a mental health professional to get help in coping with it day to day, and/or see your doctor about getting on meds. Anxiety and stress are harder, because these things are part of the makeup of human nature, and you can't always eliminate the causes of anxiety or stress. What has always helped me with these is my own personal version of the serenity prayer. " God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; wisdom to know the difference; and strength to accept your answer to these when it is offered." And don’t simply SAY this… LIVE it. It is very, very difficult to accept that there are things that are simply out of your control. In other words… don't worry about it.

I read a book on insomnia several years ago by Dr. Deepak Chopra, and one of the excellent tips that he gave was to take control of your train of thought before it runs off the rails (my interpretation of his words). For instance, one of my big stressers for several years has been money. I value time more than I do money, so I struggle to find the balance between working to earn money and spending time doing the things that I love that do not bring money into my life (like writing this blog). So when I find myself laying in bed thinking of my financial difficulties, I redirect those thoughts to be about things that I enjoy instead. So I may start thinking about a story that I'm writing, where the story is going and how I can get there. This relaxes me and I am able, ultimately to fall asleep. Think about your spouse, your kids, a movie that you particularly like, whatever works for you.

There can also be physical causes for insomnia. In women, for instance, hormone changes can cause sleeplessness. Which means that women on their period, women going through menopause, and pregnant women are prone to insomnia. Also, any medical condition or medication that causes discomfort or raises the blood pressure can cause insomnia.

Probably the two most common physical causes of insomnia, though, are apnea (where a person stops breathing for a period of time during sleep) and restless leg syndrome (where the legs start to shake or move during sleep). Apnea may be solved with a Cpap mask, and there are medications for restless leg syndrome. For some people, this is enough.

And then there are obvious things like uncomfortable beds, noisy or bright environments, night work, etc. Some of these can be fixed, some can't. And sometimes, like in my case, you can get a more comfortable bed, move to a quieter neighborhood and get a light-blocking shade… and STILL not be able to sleep.

Here's one tip that I'm sure is going to piss SOMEBODY off, but I find that it works miracles when I'm having a hard time falling asleep. Doesn't do anything to KEEP me asleep, but if you're problem is that you just can't fall asleep, try masturbating. Seriously. All the way. Orgasm releases all kinds of endorphins in the brain to relax you and get you into the groove. And I'm not talking about sex. Sex is great, I love sex, but get your partner to sit this dance out, if you have one. This should be utterly selfish "you" time. Get it on, get off, get to sleep. As great as sex with a partner is, it is just not as relaxing as sex with yourself. Seriously. I'm not kidding.

And remember, despite what I just said, always remember…

You are not alone.

Randal